Hard

This was written on April 12th--just realized I didn't post it--

I am so glad spring is here. I didn't realize how much I needed spring until it finally arrived. Fall is usually my favorite season, but last fall seems so far away and winter was so long. Spring--has arrived. With it, all things become new.

My Mom died four months ago today. It seems so far away yet it also seems so fresh. The past few months have been really hard for me. I am a terrible communicator of my feelings. I do not like to cry or talk about things that bother me. Most of the time I try to sort them out on my own, which is not always healthy. This is all new to me so I am taking it as it comes. I know all the steps of the grieving process but it is different when you are the one going through it. It has been hard.

Easter was different for me this year. In years past I have spent a lot of time reflecting either on the crucifixion or the resurrection of Christ. This year the time in between affected me the most. I guess it is because I have lost someone close to me so I really reflected on what each loved one of Christ felt. I cannot even imagine how hard it must have been to lose your Christ, your Savior, your Messiah, your Completer. I thought about Mary who lost her son. I thought about Peter who denied his Rabbi. I thought about Mary Magdalene who lost her Savior. I thought about the disciples who lost all hope. I wonder what the darkness of those few days felt like for them. They didn't have the resurrection to look forward to because they weren't looking for it. I cannot even imagine how hard it was for them. They didn't even know that they were waiting for something. They didn't realize that after the fall, their spring was going to arrive.

I am so glad that I do not have to wait for a resurrection.
I am so blessed that I won't lose my Savior.
I have hope.

That resurrection morning was glorious. Each time Christ appeared was like spring arriving. He made all things new, He makes all things new. A mother had her Son. Peter had reconciliation. Mary had her Savior. The disciples had their hope. A few days of darkness would never exist again.

I know there are a lot of hard things in our lives. I know of precious people to me that are going through hard things right now. Hard times last a long time. I am so glad that we have hope in Christ that He will reconcile us to Him during our hard times.

No matter what your "hard" time is, may you remember that you have
The Son,
The Christ,
The Savior,
The Messiah,
The Rabbi,
The Completer.

May you find your spring in Him even when the fall seems long and hard.