Dump

Two weeks ago in Bible Study we talked about Luke 7:36-50 which is "A Sinful Woman Forgiven." I have been chewing on this passage for two weeks now. I am still trying to understand how God is speaking to me. The one question that keeps coming in my mind is

"Are you dumping your faith?"

Let me explain. Not dumping as in ditching, but dumping as pouring. This is a beautiful passage about a woman who ventures into a Pharisee's house who happens to be serving Christ dinner. Except that Pharisee isn't really serving Christ. He didn't wash his feet when He came in, he didn't give Him the custom kiss of greeting, nor did he anoint Christ with oil on His forehead. The funny thing is, the Pharisee calls Jesus "teacher" when Jesus addresses the comments made about the "sinful" woman. The Pharisee (named Simon) would not usually have any contact with sinners and was abhorred that this woman was there at the feet of Jesus and abhorred that Jesus would have contact with such a sinful person. Apparently the woman had a reputation.

This woman is brave. She enters a house where she is not welcome. She knows there could be consequences. She also knows that Jesus is there. Jesus has not yet claimed to be the Christ, Son of God. She comes in, kisses and wets His feet with her tears, wipes them with her hair, and dumps a an alabaster jar of ointment on His feet. The jar of alabaster ointment was probably the most expensive thing she owned. She never says anything to Christ, never asks for forgiveness, never verbally repents of any sin, never asks for salvation. She doesn't have to.

Jesus looks at her the whole time He is addressing Simon's thoughts. I wonder what His face looked like as He looked at her. He tells her that her sins are forgiven and that her faith has saved her. I wonder what the woman's face looked like when He said that. I wonder what Simon's face looked like when He said that.

I wondered if I could have been like the woman who was the "sinner."
I wondered if I could have been like the Pharisee named Simon.

Regardless, both desperately needed Christ.

So I have been thinking for two weeks now if I dump my faith out at the feet of Jesus? Do I dump my faith out as a testimony to others? Do I dump my faith out on others? Or do I live in my own dump?

I love that God continuously shows me where I am at, and where I need to go, and where I need to be. I love that the woman never had to say anything to Jesus and that He didn't have to say anything for her to know that He was the Christ. I love that she showed that her faith was her most prized possession by giving her most prized possession. I love that she wasn't afraid to dump herself out. I love that she was redeemed before Christ died on the cross. I love that God used a sinful woman to teach a Pharisee of his sin. I love that I don't have to worry if whether or not I would have been the woman or the Pharisee,
because I am already redeemed by The Christ, The Son of God.

May we dump ourselves at the feet of Christ, kiss His feet, cry over our sin, and surrender our faith to Him.

"And he said to her, "Your sins are forgiven." v. 48
"And then He said to the woman, "Your faith has saved you; go in peace." v. 50

Shine

I love to feel the warmth of the sun on my face. On a good fall or spring afternoon, even on a hot summer day it feels good to tilt my face to feel the sun. Here in GA, we haven't really seen the sun since, well..... August. We have had a few days here and there when the sun has shown and it really makes a difference. I hear everybody say how much they miss the sun lately. It is amazing how the absence of the sun affects us all so much! This morning I was out pruning some bushes and my crepe myrtle and was so wishing I could tilt my face up to feel the sun. Maybe tomorrow. At least it is something to look forward to---a little sunshine!

Ashlie started Bible Study last week asking us to define glory in reference to God. We said things like "recognition, essence, praise, and adoration." She said it is one of those "churchy" words we use sometimes that is hard to pinpoint the exact meaning even though we get it in our head. She gave us two definitions, one from the Old Testament and one from the New Testament. Glory is mainly used as a verb in the OT as "kabad." In reference to God it means to be heavy or weighty. It is God revealing who He is, His heaviness, His presence. It is used 106 times this way in the OT. In the NT, glory is used as a noun "doxa" in view, opinion, magnificence, and preeminence of Christ. It is used 150 times in the NT in this way. So how does this glory work in our sanctification?

We always say things like "give God the glory" or "to God be the glory" or "glorify Him." God already has the glory. He is the glory. What can we give Him? Ashlie reminded us that we represented God's glory before the fall of man. We were made in His image. Now that we have sinned, we have lost it. We distorted it in us. He still has it but the only way we can share in it, reveal it, is through our relationship with Christ. The precious righteousness He gives us when we surrender to Him reveals Himself to others. It is nothing we can do on our own because of our darkness, but it is His glory that shines as He is changing us to be more like Him, the way we were meant to be.

My sweet sister gave me some precious words last week. After she read my post she reminded me of something I need in my relationship with Christ. She told me to read John 13:1-15. It is the passage where Christ washes His disciples feet before Judas betrays Him. When Christ gets to Peter, Peter tells Him, "You shall never wash my feet." (v.8) He didn't understand the humility in Christ. My sister reminded me that even though this passage teaches me how to serve others, I must also remember that Christ wants to wash my feet. That I need to sit in His presence and bask in His glory. That I love Him because He first loved me. I want so badly to remove the rust from the bucket and be sanctified I get focused on doing, doing, doing. I forget that God wants to polish me. That I don't "need" to do anything. Sometimes He wants me to be still and sit at His feet. He makes me shiny. That is why He has me quiet and wants me to rest.
Thanks sis for seeing things I forget.

The glory we have is given to us by God. We need to reflect Him and give it back. We need His glory to overcome our darkness.

Tilt your face to feel the warmth of the Son.
There are a lot of days we don't see the Son.
There are a lot of people who are missing the Son lately.
The Son really makes a difference.
It is amazing how the absence of the Son affects us all so much.
Don't wait until tomorrow. Bask in His glory today.

I pray that you will feel they heaviness, weightiness, presence, view, magnificence, and preeminence of God's glory.
It is His. It is Him. He is the Son.

"The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord lift up His countenance upon you and give you peace." Numbers 6:24-26. Aaron's blessing given to Moses by God.

Six

Saturday night JJ fell asleep on the couch. He had played outside almost the entire day. He was wiped. We woke him up and made him go upstairs to get ready for bed. I was waiting for him on his bed when he came out of the bathroom. I said "JJ brush your teeth." He paused and walked to the sink and just stood there. I said "what's wrong?" He said "I don't have a toothbrush." By the look on my face, he knew he'd been had!!
"Why don't you have a toothbrush?" Silence. "Where is your toothbrush?" Silence. My voice rising, "How long have you not had your toothbrush?" Silence. Me becoming ballistic, "Did you leave your toothbrush at your friend's house when you slept over there LAST weekend?" Slow head nod yes. "SO YOU MEAN YOU HAVEN'T BRUSHED YOUR TEETH FOR A WEEK? DO WE NOT HAVE A PLETHORA (yes I said plethora) OF TOOTHBRUSHES UNDER THE SINK?" Slow head nod yes. "WHY DID YOU NOT GET ONE OF THOSE? DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DON'T BRUSH YOUR TEETH? CAVITIES!!
HOW OLD ARE YOU JJ?
DO YOU NOT KNOW BY NOW TO BRUSH YOUR TEETH?"

Of course at this point I was so beside myself that I had to leave the room. This was after he had gotten up at 8 a.m. Sat morning, played for two hours before we left the house, and then informed me he was hungry because he had forgotten to eat breakfast. This was after I drove the child back up to school Thursday night to get his homework out of his desk because he had left it there for the third time. So I had a Mommy moment Saturday night.

JJ is six.

So after I tucked him and got myself settled into bed, I laid there thinking about the whole situation. Why did I get so aggravated at him? After all, it is not like he was disobedient. Forgetting homework, breakfast, teeth brushing, is not a sin. It just isn't important to him. He is six. All he wants to do is play. He will deal with his grades, hunger, and cavities when he wants to. When he isn't playing. When someone tells him too.
Because he is six.
That is why I was so aggravated. These things seem so little to him now, but they are important to his life. I want him to understand that he is responsible, he is accountable for everything he does in life. I want him to realize that skipping small stuff, leads to bigger stuff. That there are consequences. Even though these things may not seem important to him and only important to me, they should be important to him. I had this discussion with JJ after the fact. I want him to listen. I want him to understand. This is part of growing up, even though he is only six.

Sunday God whacked me over the head with the whole situation. He reminded me that I am just like JJ. That there are so many "little" things I skip in my relationship with Him because I am too busy "playing" life. I let the "me" distract me. God reminded me of my accountability to Him. He reminded me of what I skip because it doesn't seem important at the time. He reminded me that in my relationship with Him, sometimes I am only six. That's a long way from being galvanized!!!!

I want Christ to rule every thought, action, and piece of my heart. I want to be a Godly wife. I want to be a Godly example for Nia and JJ. I want to be accountable and take captive everything to God. I am humbled how God uses my teaching moments (or ballistic moments) with my kids to teach me. It reminds me how unworthy I am to have Him as my parent.

I pray that we wouldn't let this world distract us. I pray that we would do our "homework." I pray that we wouldn't ignore our hunger for God's Word. I pray that we would continually "brush our teeth" so we can remove everything that isn't suppose to be there to allow the only One that is.

May you grow beyond "six" in your relationship with God.

....But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves to God, the benefit you reap
leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life. Romans 6:22

Quiet

My life is quiet right now. Even in the midst of jobs, housework, school, soccer practice, cleaning, shopping, bill paying; it is quiet. It is a mental quiet. A spiritual quiet. A sorrowful quiet. There are days when I don't want to read my Bible. There are days when I wish I could just sit and do nothing. There are days when I have so many things to pray about I can't keep them straight. There are days when I try to occupy myself with different things so that there is no time for me to think or be sad. I keep waiting for God to give me a revelation as to what He is doing in my life.
For now, it is all quiet.

I have never lost someone as close to me as my Mom. There is a quiet void where she once occupied so much of my life. I find myself thinking about so many different things. Things I wish I would have done different. Things I wish I could do now like talk to her on the phone, bring her a Starbucks, or a frozen coke from Burger King. The past few weeks have gotten increasingly harder for me. I know this is all part of grief. I am learning as I go. That is why I think God has told me to be quiet.

We talked about a lot in Bible Study last week. Ashlie taught out of 1 Corinthians 10:23- 11:1. This section in my Bible is titled "Do all to the glory of God." We talked about the law, what was permissible, the struggle of the Corinthians, why Paul was writing this letter, and the struggle of the unbelievers of that time. The focus of the Bible study, however, was that we are the extension of Christ. Everything we do should be not only for the glory of God but for the constructing of other's in their Christianity. Our job is to edify Christ by building up somebody else's spiritual life. As Ashlie put it, "We are the tool in other people's sanctification."

So much of what I do or do not do is selfishness. I constantly pray that God would peel off whatever He doesn't want of me. What I realized this past week is that even in my desire for my sanctification, I have become selfish. The things I do or do not do for other people revolves around me. God is really convicting me of that in the mourning of my Mom. Verse 33 says that we are "not suppose to seek our own advantage, but the advantage of many, that they may be saved." I laid in bed last night thinking "was I edifying to God in my relationship with my Mom? Did I help her in her sanctification?" I do not know the answer to that nor can I change anything now that it is all past. I do however want to be a tool in other people's sanctification. I don't want it to be all about me.
So God has presented me with a lot to ponder in my quietness. That is good, because I am learning as I go.

God has incredible ways He wants to use us in the lives of others. I pray that we will ask Him if we are edifying Him. I hope that we will reflect on our relationships with our spouses, children, pastors, friends, neighbors and wonder if we are building them up in their sanctification. I hope we will find the quiet even if it is in the midst of chaos, sorrow, and void. I hope we will be okay with that quiet. That is when we learn.

"Let no one seek his own good, but the good of his neighbor." 1 Corinthians 10:24